A cat lover writing about cats is natural. But me, an acknowledged non-lover of cats writing about the felines seems paradoxical. Don't expect me to sing paeans in praise of cats. I am writing this in frustration, as all the family members are ganged up against me: my husband, daughters and grandchildren are all mesmerised by cats.

There are three cats ruling roost - the oldest is Billoo (a tomcat), then there's Kitten, another male cat, and the youngest, Whitey, a female cat. Billoo came to stay here more than three years ago - to fill in the gap left by the sudden disappearance of our first cat (an old and handsome tomcat named after an evergreen hero). Billoo was a kitten, a few months old, white with grey patches. He has made my hubby his complete slave, as his absence even for a day makes my hubby moan and sulk till Billoo appears again. I don't know what he sees endearing in the scrawny old villain who - after guzzling large amounts of milk and bread - has become fat with heavy jowls and slit eyes. Kitten, the other tomcat, is eccentric. He is not very particular about milk and food, but every now and then he enters the house, mews and then goes out again. The sole female cat, Whitey, is very systematic - she comes regularly for her milk and food, dosa being her favourite food. She is now about 1½ years old and suitors have started wooing her. Soon we may find her having a litter of her own. God help us then.

The strange thing about hubby (who loses his temper at the drop of a hat) is his infinite patience with the cats. When they bring in dead rats at night and strew their entrails under our bed, hubby patiently cleans up the mess. He does not mind the cats leaving muddy paw marks all over the windowsills and walls when they clamber in during the rainy season. Sometimes after cat fights, Billoo or Kitten come in with black eyes, cuts and bruises or with limping legs. Hubby nurses them lovingly.

Whenever I find the cats curled up on the sofa or chairs, I angrily drive them out. It is a losing battle, as I am the lone member in the opposition. So I have no other option but to settle for a peaceful co-existence. What else can I do?