Review of Bollywood Calling

An uproarious reflection of the happenings in the Hindi film industry, Bollywood Calling is a must-see for all those movie maniacs who seek out the lighter side of life. The film opens in an American setting, with a desperate third grade Hollywood actor, Patrick Stormare (Pat Cusick), being urged to take up an Indian film. Initially unenthusiastic, Pat eventually agrees because he realizes he has nothing to lose, with his career in the red, his health failing him, and his wife abruptly walking out on him.

He then meets India's connoisseur director Subramaniam (Om Puri) who animatedly narrates the story of his forthcoming blockbuster, 'Maut - the Death', which is the story of two brothers who get separated due to the quirks of fate, and subsequently reunite, in the traditional Hindi filmy ishtyle. Pat demands a script, which Subramaniam (Subra, for short) denies him, saying, 'Full script nat ready saar' in a typical South Indian accent. Pat fumes in irritation, and refuses to act in Subra's film. But Subra coaxes and cajoles the reluctant Hollywood catastrophe into accepting the role of the separated American brother of his Indian counterpart, who has turned into a dacoit. Subra even claims to have watched Pat's first (and only) film, Blood Feather (an utter flop), 62 times!

The movie gains momentum as Pat comes to India and begins work at the unit of 'Maut'. The harsh realities of the film industry surface giving us a glimpse of the gross indiscipline and chaos that prevails among the different contributors in the making of a film. Scenes are decided on the spot, dialogues scribbled on scraps of paper, the screenplay is haphazard, and there's never a script to support the storyline. Pat is subjected to hours of waiting for the other stars to come in, frustrating moments with Subra who always evades the subject of the script like the plague, and some soul-searching moments resulting from pieces of advice from beautiful Kajal (Perizaad Zorabian).

He is stunned to see the whole unit literally falling at the feet of Manu Ji (Navin Nischol) who seems to demand respect rather than command it. Most of the crew makes it obvious that they actually have no regard for him, but they pretend to revere him as they have no choice. The film subtly demonstrates the extent of hypocrisy that exists in Indian society, but the message hits you square in the face.

Perizaad Zorabian portrays a down-to-earth Bollywood actress, who would pay any price for stardom. Though she is an Indian, she exhibits a great deal of Westernization as far as attitude goes, and boldly corners Pat into having a sexy one-night stand with her.

At the outset, Pat is extremely frustrated and disorientated by the extent of disorganization in the film industry. But as he goes along, he loosens up and begins to enjoy the moments. He even becomes comfortable delivering clichéd Hindi dialogues like, "Kuthey, main tujhe zindaa nahi chhodoonga," and "Main tera khoon pee jaaoonga," etc.

The twist comes when Pat offends Manu Ji and the whole unit of 'Maut' is forced to bear the brunt of the alienation, with Manu Ji canceling all the shooting dates. Subra promptly decides to send Pat back to America, and that is when Pat reveals the horrific reality that he is dying of liver cancer. These are a few touching moments when Pat effortlessly endears himself to everyone around. This truth softens even the hardened Manu Ji, and shooting resumes.

The various scenes and song sequences depicted during the course of the shooting are truly hilarious, as most of them come very close to scenes in the stereotypical Hindi movies. Even the ridiculous dress sense that prevails in the Indian film industry has been mocked at subtly. In the end, Pat returns to America with sweet memories of India, and after going through many cycles of chemotherapy, miraculously recovers from the deadly disease. He goes back to his wife and woos her romantically, by singing one of the silly numbers from 'Maut'!

All in all, a refreshing break from the clichéd masala movies, Bollywood Calling is sure to keep you giggling away for the most part. Some excellent acting by Om Puri and Perizaad Zorabian make it worth every pie you pay for the ticket. Don't miss it!